A Nightmare at JC Penny's

You ever have one of those days/events where you later look back and go "boy that sure seemed like a good idea at the time."? Well today was one of those days. I took TLC to JC Penny's Portrait studio. Auntie Cracker and Sweetie pie met us there. So did The Hunters Twin sister, her boyfriend/baby daddy and their daughter Turtle. Hunters twin was late so by the time she got there TLC was already startin to get fussy. Oh boy.. here we go. So while we were waitin for Twin we decided to take single pics of the little critters. I am not sure but I think the lady helping take pictures did a couple lines of coke before lunch. She was so loud and obnoxious that TLC took one look at her and turned into Velcro boy. So finally we get through the picture taking ordeal. They tried to get TLC and Sweetie pie to sit on Auntie Cracker and Me and We made it very clear that we wanted no part of us to show in the pictures. "No problem" they say, "We will just crop you out". Oh by the way that's how they get cha, once they crop the picture, it's considered "enhanced" and you can no longer use your coupon. So after an hour and then finding out that we couldn't use our coupon on any of the REALLY BAD PICTURES they took of my screaming banshee of a child, they then informed me that there would be a sitting fee on every child in the picture. WHAT!!! You people told me when I specifically asked about sitting fees that there was only one and that I could use a coupon!!! Needles to say we left without any pictures and a whole hour and a half of my life that I will never get back. I got in the car looked at OD (who also went with us for support) by the way she is the worlds best sister, and said " I feel like I just broke up with a bad boyfriend. That is how drained I feel. End conclusion. Fuck JC Penny's Portraits in Sun Valley mall. You suck!
PS. before I left the house the cheap ass port-a-gee hunter says " why don't you just do it your self?" So now when I get home he gets to say "told ya so".

He's baackk.

That's right folks, after twenty one days in back country Idaho, the mighty hunter has returned home. That was Tuesday night. So far, so good. Although we did have a discussion about body mass index which I didn't really like. (He lost more weight while hunting. I think it's becoming an obsession with him.) He did take some pretty cool self portraits while gone.

The funny things that only I live with are already starting to happen. So when you kill a large animal in the woods, you have to quarter it up and pack it out. You stick the meat in canvas bags. Well when The Hunter got home he put said bags into the washer to soak. (proof to me that he does indeed know how to use the washer) I decided to help him out and put the bags into the dryer. (I am a wonderful wife that way) Apparently The Hunter does not turn the bags inside out to make sure all the little bits of meat are out of the bags. Let me just tell you it is really gross after it goes thru your washer. Yuck!

Feedin ducks

With the Hunter gone TLC tries to help me keep life exciting. After I had two chickens make a break for it this morning while feeding, I had the baby in PJs in one arm (no shoes) trying to keep four goats poking large horns and faces in the chicken food and trying to open the gate to the coop with the other. Apparently this was spotted by the first chicken as an opportune time to escape. Out she goes. Damn. I couldn't put the baby down to catch her for fear of the goats trampling him and besides that he had on no shoes. So I throw down the scratch for the other cluckers and leave the gate just barely open, run around to try and shoo her in. Nope not happening. Then her sister sees she is out and woohoo the race is on. The good news is I am the best Chicken wrangler this side of the Pecos. ( A lot of people don't know that. I also have been know to round up the occasional emu) I ended up catchin the chickens by their little tails (The Hunter says I am like lighting) and tosses their little butts back in the coop. All without lettin the goats in the chicken pen. (Chicken chow is VERY bad for goats.) And I still made it where I was going on time.
So in the afternoon I took TLC to the marina to feed the ducks. (Like we don't have enough critters around here to feed. ) Our favorite girl Sweetie Pie came too. So here are our adorable children running around, I see TLC lean over and pick something up....Hmm. "Caca Mommy, Caca" I look down at what he is holding. It is a great big gooey, green glob of runny snot like goose poop. "Yuck Dude!" of course I left the diaper bag with the wipes in the truck. So here I am trying to wipe it off with a piece of drift wood (and not doing a very good job, wood does not a napkin make)before I pick him up or he decides to taste it. Not much grosses me out and this was so gross. And Sweeties pies Mommy just sat on the bench and laughed her butt off. Any way that was my day. I hope yours was better.